File No. 150

HAHAHA Science Joke!!!
Chicken Little: “The third fastest land mammal in the world is the blue buffalo.”
Jabberwocky: “It’s blue when coming at you, red when going away.”

File No. 147

And Then Baloo Gave Them a Railroad Spike That Read, “Manifest Your Destiny”.
Chicken Little: “You, The Mad Hatter, and Rose Red will be roommates next year? It will be the Irish, the Chinese, and the Polish.”
Jabberwocky: “By our powers combined, there will be a railroad in that backyard.”

File No. 146

There Goes the Shakira Halloween Costume
Chicken Little: “I literally cannot shimmy.”
Jabberwocky: “I’m quite alright with that.”
Rose Red: “What does it mean to shimmy?”
Chicken Little: “It’s when you shake your upper body really fast so all your…parts shake.”
Jabberwocky: “You’re pretty stacked Rose Red, you could do it.”
Rose Red: “No, I can’t. I also can’t roll my Rs. I think the two are related.”

File No. 140

Looking On the Brighter Side of Depression
Jabberwocky: “Maybe some eccentric millionaire will leave their entire fortune to you and then die.”
Chicken Little: “I don’t have that kind of luck.”
Jabberwocky: “Maybe it will be a cursed fortune.”

File No. 136

For Being Unclean
Billy Goat Gruff: “The Babylonians made beer, and they didn’t have sterile technique.”
Chicken Little: “And a lot of people died.”
Billy Goat Gruff: “That’s because God was smiting them.”

File No. 134

And tickets are going fast
Chicken Little: “It’s an hour until the next lecture, someone entertain me.”
Billy Goat Gruff: “I’m going to take a dump, but that’s only going to take thirty minutes.”

File No. 124

And as having good taste.
Chicken Little: “Jabberwocky, Sleeping Beauty enjoys the company of people…just not you.”
Billy Goat Gruff: “That’s how we diagnosed her as female.”

File No. 120

People always seem to forget about those guys.
Chicken Little: “So he has a tattoo. That’s not diagnostic.”
Jabberwocky: “Dude, it’s the 1950’s. The only people with tattoos are Yakuza.”
Sleeping Beauty: “Well…there were the Jews.”

File No. 096

The life of an Indiana gourd is fraught with perils
Chicken Little: “Indiana, where people have sex with everything that’s not human.”
Jabberwocky: “So long as you have a plan…and a tradition.”
Chicken Little: “…and a pumpkin.”

File No. 094

How about a real golf club?
Jabberwocky: “You answer was correct, excellent. As a reward, I’ll hit you in the head once with this giant novelty golf club.”
Chicken Little: *glares*
Jabberwocky: “Twice?”
Chicken Little: *glares*
Jabberwocky: “There is no pleasing you.”

File No. 091

Safety first
Chicken Little: “Can I use your phone?”
Jabberwocky: “Only if you wear the phone goggles.”

File No. 090

…and do I hear ovaries in the background?
*Chicken Little answers Jabberwocky’s phone*
Chicken Little: “Hey Baloo, we’re about to leave the hospital.”
Baloo: “Jabberwocky, what’s wrong? You sound so small and un-bearded. Is everything alright?”

File No. 069

All these years I’ve been eating crackers instead
Rose Red: “Did you know the mere act of drinking quenches thirst?”
Chicken Little: “…no shit?”

File No. 059

Interventions would be so much more fun, though
Professor: “When we see someone with a substance abuse problem, we usually respond like the ostrich.”
Jabberwocky: “Lay an obnoxiously large egg?”
Chicken Little: “Disembowel them with your feet?”
Professor: “Put your head in the sand.”
Jabberwocky and Chicken Little: “Oh…”

File No. 053

That and the displacement of native populations
Chicken Little: “I’m trying to describe Manifest Destiny.”
Baloo: “Manifest Destiny? I’m pretty sure that looks a lot like California.”

File No. 049

Hey now, you’re an All-Star, get your game on, go play…
Professor: “Blaka, blaka, blaka, marsupialization, blaka…”
Chicken Little: “What is ‘Marsupialization’?”
Jabberwocky: “I don’t know, I’ve been sitting here trying to remember the lyrics to, ‘All-Star’ by Smashmouth for the last ten minutes.”

File No. 047

Sitting next to Chicken Little during boring lectures carries a few risks
Chicken Little: “In my mind, I dismantled my pen, took out the ink cartridge, and stabbed you repeatedly in the ribs.”

File No. 042

It’s funny until she tries to take a harpoon into the OR
Rose Red [Reading from notes]: “Polycystic Ovarian Disease, also known as the Great White Ovary.”
Chicken Little: “…I am Ahab.”

File No. 030

It was a lovely ceremony
Chicken Little: “Are you married?”
Billy Goat Gruff: “…to the sea.”
Jabberwocky: “He’s just too cheap to buy a ring.”

File No. 028

Instead of a surgical mask, Chicken Little wears full-blown SCUBA gear into surgery. Scares the hell out of the circulating nurses
Jabberwocky (quoting Wikipedia): “…then surgical exploration of the scrotum is warranted.”
Chicken Little (with Jacques Cousteau accent): “If we look into zee briny deep…”